Nancy J. Bickford

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Amber Rose recently filed for divorce from rapper hubby Whiz Khalifa. According to TMZ, she’s convinced that Khalifa has been cheating for quite some time now and making excuses that just don’t add up. When Rose wanted to join Khalifa on tour, he allegedly told her that she should stay home with their 1 year child instead. But Khalifa is convinced that it’s Rose who has been the one cheating and that she’s accusing him just to cover up her own infidelity.

Unfortunately many divorces, not just celebrity divorces, stem from an unfaithful partner. Unfaithfulness leads to a lack of trust between the spouses and then typically a complete breakdown of the marriage itself. Although finding out that your spouse is or has been unfaithful can be extremely painful for you and your family, here are some warning signs that you can look for to help determine whether your spouse has been or is on the verge of being an unfaithful partner.

1) There are extended periods of time where your spouse is unaccountable 2) Your spouse is spending more and more time with his/her “new friend”
3) There is distance in the bedroom between the two of you 4) Your spouse has a sudden need for privacy regarding his/her computer activity, cell phone activity, credit cards, etc.
5) Your spouse is requesting space to figure out his/her feelings 6) Your spouse’s typical work habits change (i.e. working much later or odd hours)
7) Your spouse is having secretive phone callsIf you can answer yes to any of the above then it might be time for you to consider talking to a family divorce lawyer. However, keep in mind that even though most people agree that adultery is wrong, California’ s divorce laws are actually forgiving of adultery. In fact, California was the first state to implement the concept of a no-fault divorce in 1970. This means that California Courts will not consider infidelity as a ground for divorce. Family law judges in California also cannot order the “cheater” to pay spousal support simply because of his/her misconduct. Rather, spousal support is based on the financial needs of one spouse and the other spouse’s ability to pay it. In California, adultery also does not play a factor is the Court’s decision regarding child custody and visitation. Rather, California Court looks at what is in the best interests of the children.
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After more than twenty (20) years of marriage, matriarch of the Kardashian clan filed for divorce from Olympic gold medalist, Bruce Jenner. The couple announced their split in October 2013, but continued to work to figure out their relationship on the reality show Keeping up with the Kardashians. The couple began to live separate and apart when Bruce moved out of the family home and into his own place in Malibu, California. However, they continued to take family vacations together and celebrate family events. In September 2014, Kris filed a Petition for Dissolution citing June 2013 as the parties’ date of separation – a few months earlier than previously announced. Shortly thereafter Bruce filed a Response to the Petition citing the same date of separation.

The date of separation is a crucial consideration in any divorce proceeding. Regardless when either party files a divorce petition, the marital community ends upon the date of separation. The date of separation occurs when one party has determined there marriage is over and his or her actions evidence that decision. Typically, all the earnings and accumulations of the parties from the date of marriage through the date of separation are community property. This means that those earnings and accumulations will be equally divided upon divorce. Since Bruce and Kris agree they separated in June 2013, all earnings and accumulations of either party after that date are the separate property of that party.

Pursuant to the filings, the parties agree to share joint legal and physical custody of their seventeen year-old daughter, Kylie. Out of the ten (10) children Kris and Bruce have collectively only one of their children is under the age of eighteen (18). In reality, Kris and Bruce will not likely share custody of Kylie in the normal sense of a “week on week off” schedule or “every other weekend” plan. As shown on their reality show, Kylie generally travels between her parents as her busy schedule permits. Both parents have encouraged Kylie to spend quality time with the other.

According to sources close to the Kardashian’s Kris and Bruce’s respective managers have worked out the fine details of their divorce during the past eleven (11) months of their separation. As a result, the divorce process should be relatively quick. One incentive for celebrities to reach agreements outside of the court system is privacy. As long as the Jenner’s have reached an agreement on all issues, they will likely be required to file many more documents to officially wrap up their divorce. In addition, the Jenner’s have the option to file an abbreviated version of their final judgment, keeping the specific terms out of reach for the public.
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The family residence is sometimes the parties’ biggest asset acquired during marriage. It is also typically an asset that one or both of the parties feel very attached to. When going through a divorce, the parties will have to decide whether to sell the house, continue to co-own it or have one spouse keep the house and “buyout” the other spouse’s interest in the house. A “buyout” is typically an attractive option when there are kids involved and the parent staying in the house wants to continue to provide continuity and stability for the kids. It is also an appealing option if the market conditions don’t favor the seller at the time. To “buyout” the other spouse means that the house will be assigned a certain value and the spouse not keeping the house will instead receive a percentage of the that value less the debt. The buying spouse either pays money to the selling spouse or gives up other marital property in the amount of the selling spouse’s share. Thus, the fair market value of the home makes a big difference on how much the “buyout” will cost the selling spouse.

There are a few different ways to value your marital residence. It is important for the valuation to be as fair and accurate as possible. Typically parties either get the residence appraised, have a realtor do a comparative market analysis or the parties do individual research based on online websites.

If the parties choose to value the home based on individual research, they will typically use an online website such as Zillow.com or Eappraisal.com, which gives immediate estimates of the home’s value. The parties can also ask a real estate agent to perform a Comparative Market Analysis, for little or no cost, which provides information about recent sales prices of comparable houses in the neighborhood. Then you can you’re your home’s value on those comps.

However, not all houses are the same, and thus comps and online websites are not always the most accurate way to determine the fair market value of a house. Instead, the most accurate way to determine the fair market value of a house is to have an appraisal done by a neutral and licensed appraiser. Of course this method will cost the parties a small chuck of change. The parties can either agree on a joint appraiser and perhaps split the cost, or they can each pay to have their own appraisers do an appraisal and split the difference between the fair market value. The cost of an appraisal is usually worth it to make sure that you are using an accurate number to value your home and thus calculate the buyout amount.
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The beginning of a new school year is an exciting and stressful time for children and their parents. Parents are worried about getting their children clothes for the cooler season, school supplies for new classes, and making sure they get back into the rhythm of homework and extra- curricular programs. If you are recently divorced, getting the kids back to school will be even more challenging and it is important to consider different issues which tend to arise. The following is a list of tips for newly divorced families to help ensure the first transition back to school is successful for the children.

Have a Meet and Greet with the New Teacher
It is important to the success of your child that parents and teachers are on the same page regarding the child’s education and any behavioral issues. Especially if your child is established at his or her school, it may be a good idea to discuss your recent divorce with your child’s teacher. Let the teacher know about the new custody and visitation arrangement and how your child is handling the divorce. Teachers at the school may be used to only calling or emailing a particular parent whenever an issue arises. To ensure the lines of communication are open, ask the new teacher to provide duplicate handouts to your child and to update both parents whenever he or she has information to report. That way both parents can stay equally involved in the child’s education.Update Contact Information with the School
Many divorcing parents opt to sell their marital residence in order to reduce overall costs for the two households which now must be financed. It is important to make sure your child’s school is aware that your child has moved, if applicable. In addition, your child’s school should have updated contact information for both parents.

Coordinate Child Sharing with your Co-Parent – not your Child
Now that a new school year has started, there are a lot of small details to be worked out regarding who will drop the child off at school, what time school starts, who will pick the child up from school, making sure homework is completed on time, and scheduling extracurricular activities. It is important to work these details out with your co-parent without involving the children. Putting the children in the middle of these discussions is stressful and confusing. Try to stay organized with your co-parent so that the children have a smooth transition between school and their two new homes.
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At the core of a custody dispute in a divorce is your child. You may think that the child should be in your sole custody but your spouse might wholly disagree and think that the child should be in his sole custody. The court will take the both sides’ arguments into consideration when determining custody division. But when will the Court look to the child and ask for his/her preference for living with mom and/or dad? Does the child even get a say in the matter?

The conventional thought has typically been that a courtroom is not a place for a child and as mature adults we should not be directly entangling children in custody disputes. Consequently, there was a time in California when a child’s preference regarding custody after his/her parents divorced really wasn’t considered by family law judges unless the child was in his/her late teenage years. However, a child’s preference regarding which he/she lives with, how the child can make that preference known to the court and the appropriate age for a child to be able to make a choice has evolved over the years.

Family Code Section 3042 became operative in January 2012 and changed the game with regard to a child’s custody preference. Family Code Section 3042 provides that: “If a child is of sufficient age and capacity to reason so as to form an intelligent preference as to custody or visitation, the court shall consider, and give due weight to, the wishes of the child in making an order granting or modifying custody or visitation.” Although the law does not require children to testify, if the child is 14 years of age or older and wishes to address the court regarding his/her preference for custody or visitation, the court is required to hear from that child absent a good cause finding that it would not be in the child’s best interest to do so (and the judge states the reasons on the record). If the child is under the age of 14 and wishes to address the family law court regarding his/her custody preference, then the court may allow the child to testify “if the court determines that it is appropriate pursuant to the child’s best interests.” California Rules of Court 5.250 is intended to implement Family Code section 3042.

The above changes in the law are significant considering that previously courts seldom allowed children to testify. Again, no law or court rule requires children to participate in the custody proceedings in court. However, when a child wishes to participate, the court must balance its duty to consider the child’s input with its duty to protect the child. While family law judges have the discretion to listen to a child’s custody preference, this does not mean that the judge will follow every aspect of the child’s preference.

Regardless of whether you are the parent who seeks custody based on your child’s preference or you are the parent opposing your child’s preference, we understand that this is a sensitive situation that could greatly affect your family and your relationship with your children. Our team can provide you with the caring and outstanding legal counsel you need and deserve. If you would like to discuss your rights under California’s child custody laws, we encourage you to contact us as soon as possible.
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Although divorce is typically filled with heavy emotions, the end result of the divorce process should be for couples to move forward to a happier life. Unfortunately, in today’s legal system, many couples come out of a divorce feeling more embittered after litigating a divorce. Choosing to mediate your divorce case, rather than litigate it, provides a much less adversarial means of getting a divorce.

Mediation is very different from hiring an attorney and appearing before a Judge in court. Mediation is also different than both parties and their individual attorneys working together to settle a divorce case. Rather, mediation (as discussed below) simply involves two parties and a credentialed mediator. The mediator is a neutral person and does not represent either party. There are no attorneys or specialist present in this type of mediation.

Once you and your spouse jointly select and retain a mediator, the three of you will meet and work through the issues you need to resolve in order to end your marriage as amicably and cost effective as possible. The process is done in a controlled and non-confrontation process so that you and your spouse will ultimately be able to decide your own divorce terms based on what is best for the both of you and your children, if any. You do not have to follow the traditional rules of dividing assets and calculating support, but your settlement must still be fair and not against public policy.

Sometimes agreements between spouses come easy but when these agreements are harder to reach the mediator will intervene. The mediator’s purpose is to help brainstorm ideas, keep the communication between the parties open and assist the couple with their decision making process by keeping them focused on the issues at hand. The mediator, unlike a judge, will not make any judgments or decisions. Rather, the mediator will facilitate the process and make sure that both parties’ interests are met and that any decisions made by the parties are mutually satisfactory to both parties.

Once the parties come to a full and final agreement, the terms of the agreement will be drafted into a Marital Settlement Agreement. Each party will have an opportunity to review the Marital Settlement Agreement before signing. The Marital Settlement Agreement will then be filed with the San Diego Family Court with the required court documents and will then become an enforceable court order.

Mediation is an ideal choice for many divorcing couples. Not only is the process much quicker and less expensive than hiring an attorney to litigate, but it also gives both parties the power to create a unique solution to their divorce that best fits the needs of the parties. As a result, the parties have much more control over the potential outcome of their divorce.
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So not only has your wife/husband left your marriage high and dry, but your ex already has a new boyfriend or girlfriend who is just plain bad news. Perhaps the new boyfriend/girlfriend is an ex-convict, does illegal drugs, is involved in an inappropriate lifestyle or is simply not a good influence to your children. The last thing you are going to want is for that new significant other to be hanging around your kids, and possibly living under the same roof as them, when your ex-spouse has custody of the kids. So what can you do in this type of situation to protect your beloved children from this potential physical and/or emotional risk?

You first need to consider whether you are simply just upset that your ex has already moved on, and thus you are looking for revenge by requesting more custody of the kids, or if your ex’s new boyfriend/girlfriend actually poses a physical or emotional risk to your kids’ health, safety and welfare. If the latter is the case, then you may consider asking the court to award sole physical custody of the children to you.When making a custody order, the court looks at what is in the best interest of the child. California Family Code Section 3011(b)(3) states that the court shall consider the health, safety and welfare of the child when determining what is in the best interest of the child. Thus, if your ex is allowing the new boyfriend/girlfriend to spend time alone with the kids and as a result the children are being significantly negatively affected on a physical or emotional level, then perhaps the court will find that the children’s health, safety or welfare would be at risk if left in your ex’s custody. Or perhaps your ex’s new boyfriend/girlfriend has affected your ex’s ability to properly care for the children. Whatever the situation may be, you will need to prove to the court how the children’s health, safety and welfare would be at risk if left in your ex’s physical custody.

Even if your divorce is already final and custody orders are already in place, the California family law court has continuing jurisdiction over custody matters. According to Family Code Section 3022, custody orders are generally modifiable whenever the court finds that a modification is “necessary or proper” in the child’s best interest. If you have a “permanent” custody order then you may be required to show a significant change of circumstances such that custody modification is essential to the children’s welfare. In any case, if your divorce is already over and custody orders are already in place, then one possible solution is ask the Court to modify the current custody orders to give your ex-spouse less time with the children.
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In California child support cases, the parties may be surprised to learn that a parent’s duty to financially support his or her child may continue after the child becomes a legal adult at the age of eighteen (18). This idea is often confusing to the parties because child support is inextricably linked to the time the child spends with each parent. Generally, the more time the supporting parent spends with the child, the lower the child support amount will be. On the other hand, the lower the amount of time the supporting parent spends with the child, the higher the child support obligation will be.

Pursuant to Family Code section 3901, “the duty of support imposed by [Fam. Code §3900] continues as to an unmarried child who has attained the age of 18 years, is a full-time high school student, and who is not self-supporting, until the time the child completes the 12th grade or attains the age of 19 years, whichever occurs first”. As stated in this code section, even if a child attains the age of 18 years, a parent will still be obligated to financially support the child until the child finishes high school. However, despite the ability of the family court to order child support, the court cannot make corresponding custody and visitation orders of an 18 year-old adult. Therefore, a parent may be ordered to pay child support for a child who is not required to spend specified time periods with either parent.Considering the fact that timeshare with the children is such a major factor in calculating child support, parties are faced with a conundrum when one child requiring financial support is a legal adult and cannot be forced to comply with a custody and visitation order. In these cases, the court bases child support on actual timeshare instead of timeshare which is ordered pursuant to a custody and visitation agreement or order. This means that if the 18 year-old student does not want to spend time with the supporting parent, child support will be calculated with the supporting parent have minimal time with the child. As a result, the supporting parent’s child support obligation will be higher than if the parties shared equal time with the child.

Cases where a child does not want to spend time with one or both parents are very difficult. If you feel like the relationship between your child and you and/or your former spouse is deteriorating, it is important to discuss your options with your divorce attorney to work towards repairing that important relationship before the child turns 18.
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There are a plethora of differences between one state’s divorce laws and another state’s. Whether one state is better for your divorce versus another is typically a subjective opinion based on whether your specific situation would benefit from community property laws for division of assets, whether you prefer the court to be biased with regard to favoring the mother in a custody battle, etc. However, on a more objective scale, one state may be more preferable for divorce than another state simply based on how expensive and time-consuming the process is and the requirements for filing or actually getting divorced. According to Bloomberg Rankings, the following are the top 5 worst states to get a divorce in based on the state’s court filing fees, minimum time required to complete the divorce process, residency requirements, minimum separation periods before filing and other mandatory waiting periods.

5th worst: California
Unfortunately, California is ranked as the fifth worst state for a divorce. The filing fee just to get the process started is $435, which is one of the highest in the country. In order to file for divorce there is a six month residency requirement. Additionally, California is the only state that requires a six month mandatory cooling off period after filing for divorce, meaning that even if you have resolved your divorce in less than six months, the court will not restore your status to a single person until the six month waiting period expires.

4th worst: Arkansas
Arkansas also made the top 5 for the worst states to get divorced in. Although the filing fee is only $165, the state has a minimum processing time of 540 days, which is the longest in the country. The reason for this lengthy processing time is because there is an 18 month mandatory period of separation, in which living together is prohibited, before the court will grant a divorce.

3rd worst: South Carolina
Apparently, the 3rd worst state to get divorced in is South Carolina because the state requires that couples be separated for an entire year before even being able to file for divorce. The couple must also live apart during that one year separation period. Additionally, the state has a three month residency requirement if both parties are residents of the state, resulting in a minimum processing time of 450 days. If only one party lives in South Carolina, then the residency requirement is one whole year.

2nd worst: Rhode Island
Rhode Island is also near the top of the list for worst states to get divorced in. Although it has a reasonable filing fee of only $120, Rhode Island has the second-longest wait to get a divorce with a minimum processing time of 510 days.

And the Worst State to get Divorced in is: Vermont
According to Bloomberg Rankings, the worst state to get divorced in is Vermont. Married couples filing for a no fault divorce must live apart from each other for at least six months. Also there is a one year residency requirement before a divorce will be granted. But before the judge actually approves the divorce and it becomes finalized, there is an additional three month waiting period that must expire.New Hampshire: Easiest State to Obtain a Divorce
Unlike the above states, which have the most expensive filing fees, most extensive waiting periods and the most stringent residency and minimum separation period requirements, Bloomberg Rankings rates New Hampshire as the easiest state for a divorce. Perhaps this is because in New Hampshire there is no minimum processing time or minimum residency requirement, which makes the process for getting a divorce much faster. So couples in Vermont should consider going “next door” to New Hampshire for their divorce!
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One of the first hurdles to overcome in the beginning of any contentious divorce case is to determine how much support is owed from one spouse to another, if any. Many times, a dispute over the proper support amount lands the parties in court for a short hearing at the outset of the case. After a month or two of crunching numbers and producing financial information, the parties are typically relieved when they walk out of the courtroom just to have a number that they can count on to pay or receive each month. In addition, many times the parties reach an agreement regarding the amount of support on the courthouse steps and simply read their agreement on the record in front of the judge. Although neither party is usually satisfied with the amount of support, having certainty regarding monthly support provides both sides with a little stability.

The amount of support is usually the main focus in any support negotiation or hearing. However, often times the parties, attorneys, and judges forget to include details (or decide not to include details) regarding when the support payments are due each month. In a typical scenario the parties appear in court on a particular date during the month and receive a support order that is effective another date. On the first date of the following month, the supported spouse expects to get that first support check in the mail. After waiting a few days, the supported spouse may call his or her spouse or his or her attorney claiming that the paying spouse is “late” on payment. However, careful review of the support order is necessary to determine whether the paying spouse is late on his or her payment. Many times, the support order is silent on the due date of the monthly support payment.

An optimal order will state something like “Effective August 1st, 2014, and payable on the first of each month thereafter, Husband shall pay to Wife for her support and maintenance the sum of $2,000.00 per month”. Pursuant to the default family code provisions, absent a specific due date for support, the support payment is due on the last day of the month in which the support payment is to be paid. The paying spouse may be able to go over a month without paying support after the hearing which puts the supported spouse in a difficult financial position as bills become due.

In addition to waiting to the last minute to make support payments, some paying spouses argue that the support order does not become effective until a formal order is signed. Following most support hearings, the parties must agree upon and execute a formal order. However, this process can be delayed if the parties “disagree” on exactly what was ordered in court. Luckily, California courts have held that support orders become operative at the moment of pronouncement. This means that the support order is effective prior to the execution of a formal written order.
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