San Diego Divorce Attorneys BlogThe psychological evaluation is often the most important document for a parent in a divorce case. Yet the manner in which psychologists create these reports is difficult to understand, even for many family lawyers. In this multi-part series, we will examine psychological evaluations, one of the most important tools the Courts use to determine custody and visitation. In this first part, we will discuss one of the most important questions when it comes to such evaluations: Why should I request one?
Articles Posted in Divorce and Children
Effective Date for Support Orders
One of the first issues a new client will ask us about is support. Whether it is child support, spousal support, or both, support is one of the most important issues in your family law case. It’s easy to understand why. During your marriage income and expenses are shared and over time you find a happy medium between the amount of money you have coming in and the amount of money you have going out to pay expenses. After you separate, the income doesn’t change, but the expenses will often double. That means two rent payments, two food bills, two utility payments…the list goes on. If you and your spouse were just making ends meet before the separation, odds are it will be twice as difficult now that expenses have increased. Continue reading
Jules Wainstein still living with Ex; how to get out if this sounds like you
As a cast member of the Real Housewives of New York, Jules Wainstein is no stranger to drama. Surprisingly though, Jules’ impending divorce from husband Michael Wainstein filed in June has already been deemed the most dramatic divorce in Housewives history. And while it may be the most dramatic divorce the show and its cast have ever seen, Jules’ situation is actually not all that uncommon out here in the REAL, real world.
According to all of the press that the couple has received as of late, it would seem that Jules caught Michael cheating on her with one of her close friends. At that point Michael was prompted to file a petition for divorce after their eight year marriage. Since then, numerous accusations of domestic violence have surfaced, along with recent pictures of police outside the couples’ apartment. Continue reading
Don’t be a Meanie, Be a Friend
At this point almost all of America has seen the video of the adorable 6 year girl talking to her mother about divorce. (If you have not seen it yet, take a few minutes and watch it HERE.) With advice such as “Don’t be a Meanie, be a friend” and lines like, “What if there is just a little bit of persons and we eat them? Then no one will ever be here. Only the monsters in our place. We need everyone to be a person” the viewers can’t help but stop and take notice – plus this wisdom is coming from a little girl so sweet you want to eat her…but in a figurative way of course.
Back to School
With school back in full swing for children all around San Diego County, I thought I would focus my blog on a very common occurrence in child custody matter; school enrollment.
When two parents decide to get a divorce, one or both of them will often move out of the family residence. With the cost of living so high in San Diego, that can mean moving out of the neighborhood the parties lived while they were together. If the parents end up living in close proximity, the issue of where their children will be enrolled for school is an easy one. What happens when the parents move to other parts of town or into different school districts? This can create a huge headache for parents and children resulting in hours spent commuting to school and work.
They Paid What?! How Is My California Child Support Obligation Calculated?
At some point in your life, you have probably done a double-take upon hearing news of a crazy-sounding child support payment of a celebrity or famous athlete. The media loves to report on these sometimes exorbitant amounts, for the shock value given to amounts of money that many Americans may never even dream of seeing. Here are some reported examples:
• Halle Berry, paying $20,000 per month to ex-boyfriend for 1 daughter • Eddie Murphy, paying $51,000 per month for 1 daughter • Sean “Diddy” Combs, paying $20,000 per month to ex-girlfriend for 1 son and $21,782 per month for now adult son to another ex-girlfriend
• Charlie Sheen, paying $50,000 per month to ex-wife Denise Richards for 2 daughters, and $55,000 to a different ex-wife for 2 sons
• Allen Iverson, owing $8,000 per month to ex-wife • Terrell Owens, owing $120,000 per month in child support and mortgages to 4 different mothers (whether he actually pays is a completely different story…)
When A Military Parent is Deployed
San Diego is home to a great many families who serve our country in the armed forces. However, as is often the case, members of the military are deployed for periods of time away from home and separated from their families. Deployment is stressful for families, but takes on an added dimension after a divorce when parties have crafted a parenting plan for their child. What happens to your parenting plan when you are deployed overseas?
The State of California has made it a matter of public policy to ensure that a parent who is unable to follow a parenting plan due to their deployment is protected. California Family Code Section 3047 states, in part, that being deployed for military purposes shall not be a reason for a modification of a parenting plan on its own. It further states that upon a parent’s return from deployment there is a presumption that the parties’ return to the pre-deployment parenting plan. Any changes to that plan would require a showing that a reversion in not in the best interests of the child.The courts have recently reiterated the importance of Section 3047 in Marriage of E.U. and J.E. which requires both a speedy resolution to custody matters for a parent returning from deployment and placing the initial showing on the non-deployed parent to show why a reversion is not in the child’s best interest. This ruling strengthens a deployed parent’s rights upon their return.
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They Want to Move Where?!
People from around the world settle in California and specifically San Diego for many reasons, for example, our beautiful weather, or to work in the booming biotech industry. When they arrive, they marry, have children and become an integral part of the diverse San Diego community. While oftentimes people plan on staying permanently, sometimes they decide to return home. What happens when your divorced spouse wants to move with your child overseas?
For example, actress, Kelly Rutherford, is involved in a very contentious international custody dispute. After an initial joint custody award, her ex-husband gained custody of their children when his visa required him to return to Monaco. The ability of a parent to move with a child out of state or even out of the country can be very contentious. One parent’s relationship with the child will be irrevocably changed. While the determination of a move-away case can be extremely complex and fact specific, as with all matters involving children, the court relies on what it believes are in your children’s best interests before issuing a ruling.However, if one parent moves without permission from the court, you may have recourse if your spouse moved to a country that is a signatory to the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction (“Hague Convention”). The Hague Convention gives parents recourse if the moving parent has taken a child without permission, or sometimes if they are in non-compliance with a custody and visitation order. The Hague Convention attempts to return the custodial arrangement to the status quo before the abduction and it gives a framework for different jurisdictions with different laws to work together for the benefit of the child. The issues surrounding the Hague Convention are complex and require diligence to ensure the best outcome for your child.
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The End of the Nuclear Family and the Rise of the Single Parent
The iconic image of the American Family has changed according the Pew Research Center. Today, less than half (46%) of U.S. children under the age of 18 reside with two married heterosexual parents in their first marriage. In fact, 34% of U.S. children are being raised by a single parent.
Whether you are participating in a conscious uncoupling like Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martinor you are a single parent raising a child, the challenges and joys of raising children on your own are enormous and the issues involving custody disputes can seem complex. Are the California Family Law courts keeping pace with our new culture?
The answer is yes. California is at the forefront of ensuring that no matter what your personal situation, you are dealt with fairly and respectfully. The law does not distinguish between previously married and unmarried parents in custody cases. That makes the Family Court a vital resource in protecting your rights as a single parent, whether you are seeking a custody order you require child support. If you are not married to the other parent, a Judgment of Paternity is an important first step. However, navigating the Family Court system in California can be daunting, especially when you are trying to put your side of the story before the court. Bickford Blado & Botros are experienced in representing clients in their paternity and custody disputes in the Family Court and we are experienced in dealing with the complexity of the modern family dynamic.
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Step-Parent Adoptions
Blended families, a family consisting of a couple and their children from their current and all previous relationships, are a regular part of American life. That is why the following statistics should not be surprising:
• 48% of all first marriage will eventually end in divorce;
• 79% of women and 89% of men will marry again within 5 years;
• 43% of marriages today in America involve a 2nd or 3rd (re)marriage;
• 68% of re-marriages involve children from prior marriages;
• 2,100 new blended families are formed every day in America;
• Over 65% of Americans are now a step-parent, a step-child, a step-sibling, a step-grandparent or touched directly by a step-family scenario
In many cases, the children will grow very close to a step-parent and in cases where one of the biological parent’s is absent from that child’s life, the step-parent may consider adopting their step-child.
In a step-parent adoption, one biological parent retains full parental rights and the other biological parent’s rights are terminated. The parental rights are then passed to the adopting step-parent; meaning the biological parent no longer has any rights or responsibilities owed to the child and the step-parent has all the rights and responsibilities originally held by the biological parent.It is important to give due consideration to a decision to adopt a step-child, because step-parent adoption is a permanent transfer of parental rights and responsibilities. Once a step-parent adoption is finalized, it cannot be revoked or nullified, except in very rare situations. More importantly, the adoption is not terminated if the step-parent and biological parent divorce.
A step-parent must meet certain criteria in order to proceed with a step-parent adoption, specifically:
1. The biological parent and the step-parent must be legally married or in a registered domestic partnership;
2. The step-parent must be at least 18 years old and at least 10 years older than the step-child they are seeking to adopt – though in certain circumstances the 10 year rule may be waived;
3. The step-parent’s spouse must consent to the adoption;
4. The other biological parent (i.e. the biological parent whose parental right will be terminated by the adoption), must consent to the adoption – this requirement can be overcome, as I will discuss below, in certain circumstances; and 5. If the step-child is 12 years old or older, the step-child must consent to the adoption.
Family Code Section 8604(b) describes how you can overcome the other parent’s lack of consent to the adoption of the child by a step-parent. Specifically, “If one birth parent has been awarded custody by judicial order, or has custody by agreement of both parents, and the other birth parent for a period of one year willfully fails to communicate with, and to pay for, the care, support, and education of the child when able to do so, then the birth parent having sole custody may consent to the adoption, but only after the birth parent not having custody has been served with a copy of a citation in the manner provided by law for the service of a summons in a civil action that requires the birth parent not having custody to appear at the time and place set for the appearance in court…”
Family Code Section 8604(c), states:
“Failure of a birth parent to pay for the care, support, and education of the child for the period of one year or failure of a birth parent to communicate with the child for the period of one year is prima facie evidence that the failure was willful and without lawful excuse. If the birth parent or parents have made only token efforts to support or communicate with the child, the court may disregard those token efforts.”
If you are considering a step-parent adoption, or if you were served with papers notifying you that your child’s step-parent has filed an Adoption Request, it is important that you discuss your rights with an experienced family law attorney.
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